Monday, April 28, 2014

Now It's Just a Waiting Game...

Today is officially my first day as a stay-at-home-mom {I didn't count the weekend, as I was always home on weekends anyway}! I turned 37 weeks pregnant on Thursday and my last day at work was Friday. Just look at this big ol' belly!

And those thighs...yikes. This momma has her work cut out for her this summer.

So now it's just a waiting game. I sit here today at 37 weeks and 4 days...just wondering how soon this little girl will make her grand entrance into this world. Breckin is home with me and we've got plans for a lot of morning walks to hopefully help things progress. It's also felt smoldering hot lately (I'm already running the AC!} which is not helping...I am SOOOOOO D-O-N-E done. Seriously...stick a fork in me.

While I'm waiting...I plan on using this time to get things around the house cleaned and organized {summoning what little energy I have these days}.

I've noticed some pregnancy blues lately...I think now that summer is pretty much here in Charleston, I'm starting to feel self-conscious about having a post-baby body all through it. I know my kiddos are going to want to hit up the pool and the beach...and here I am wondering what the heck I will wear! Those of you that know me well, know that I probably put a little too much emphasis on my body and fitness...but it's just been a big part of my life...and it's something I can't simply "turn off". I'd love to be one of those people that could care less how I look walking on the beach, or be comfortable with the post-prego flab for a few months...but it's just not something I've ever been able to do. I'm going to feel like I have to cover it up until I can reveal a post-pregnancy body I'm proud of. I remember literally being angry with myself about 1-2 months postpartum with Breckin....because my thighs were still pretty large and I had large "love handles" didn't just fall off like it did with Tanner when I was 22. And this is my first time being so newly postpartum in the summertime...Tanner was a November baby so I had all winter to get back in shape and with Breckin, it was already August, so I just didn't wear a bikini after I had him, until the following summer. I'm very apprehensive about what's to come, knowing this time it will likely be even a little harder. I plan to start working out right away, but I know it's no overnight miracle. Accepting that is the hard part. I want to be able to wear shorts and cute shirts this summer...rock a bikini...but it probably just isn't in the cards. I'm going to try not to let it get me down...because it is what it is...but I know I will have a hard time with it internally.

Anyone else ever feel this way? I'm sure I'm not alone in my really is a lot to know once the baby comes out, the extra weight is no longer "cute". But I'm just going to do my best to work hard at my fitness goals post-baby, truly enjoy my children this summer...and try not to think about it too much and get myself down about it.

Sorry for the vent...I try not to do that too much on the blog...but sometimes, it just helps to type it out.

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