Well, we're still in Idaho enjoying and making the most of the little amount of time we have with my family. It bothers me so much that we don't live closer to them, especially now that we have children. I really wish my parents had the opportunity to see Tanner & Breckin as often as Jake's parents do. We are resolving to make a point to be better about visiting in the future...5 years between visits is way too long. {They have come to visit us, but I mean as far as us making the trip to see them.}
Anyway...I've got some thoughts for this Monday...
Simple enough, right? I mean, it
should be. I know that there are times when I've not put my best foot forward in my circle of friends, or even with complete strangers. I was younger then, and I'm human...and we all know that
young + human = mistakes. I know there have been times I could have given off a better impression.
Now that I'm older {oh, and
so much wiser}, I find myself really contemplating my actions and my words before I release them. It's a matter of stepping outside of myself and seeing it from someone else's perspective. Like, what would I think of a person if they did or said this in this or that situation? Would I respect them, understand them,
admire them? If my answer to any of those questions is
no...well, then, I take a step back and reconsider.
I find that as a woman, I face a lot of adversity...the Nosy Nancys, Chatty Cathys and Judgy {read: jealous} Janes can take a toll on you. Women are natural competitors and have a bad rap for tearing each other down without mercy...or being nice to your face while holding a knife to your back. It can be hard not to fall into that game yourself. I know
I have a time or two {or twenty maybe}. I'm sure that I've lost friends along the way because of this kind of senseless and cruel stuff {sometimes it was me; sometimes it was them}...in fact I
know it. I don't know of many girls that
can't say they've lost a friend or two because of stupid girl stuff.
What have I done to change? I don't know that I've necessarily changed as far as how I ultimately feel in those adverse situations, but I've definitely changed how I react to those feelings...because how I react is what people see; what they remember about me. They don't see the feelings...nor do they probably care. I don't want the first, or last, impression I leave on someone to be a negative one. I want people to see a girl that takes the high road...a girl that bites her tongue and smiles instead...a girl that kills adversity with kindness...a girl worthy of respect and admiration. I don't try or want any girl to be jealous of me. I don't even believe there's a lot of reason to be. Does that mean I don't have a lot going for me? No...it just means that I know I'm not the cat's meow and there is always something someone else has to offer that I can't. I don't want anyone to be jealous...there's a difference between admiration and jealousy. I want people to just think I'm a worthwhile person...and if I have strengths that maybe they don't, then I would rather they feel inspired by those strengths or even ask me for advice. Just as I want to be able to do with them because we are all different, we are all talented...and we all have strengths
and weaknesses...we all have
something to offer. I've given up the game of gossip...I don't want to hurt others. I want others to see a friend in me when they need one...or even when they don't think they need one. I want people to see the genuine person that would bend over backward for a friend or loved one...the person that remembers birthdays without the help of Facebook {if I knew you well enough in grade school, yes, I remember your birthday. Don't ask me why.} I want them to see the person that lives and works hard for her husband and sons...that is appreciative of all of God's great gifts. That person is me; the real me, but if I show them anyone other than that person, why would they want to give me a second thought? Why would they even go as far as to shake my hand?
You will always face some sort of adversity in life...what matters...and what really burns a memory in others' heads about you...is the manner in which you face that adversity.
Coco said it best, didn't she?
